Face the Future with Faith

What a wonderful talk this was, and how fitting it can seem at any time in one's life.
Face the future with faith source
But because dear reader/friend you are reading this you care. Since I informed so publicly that we were expecting, I felt I should somewhat publicly inform all that we will no longer be expecting so soon. The baby didn't develop and my body hasn't quite realized it yet. But don't say sorry, deepest sympathies, and although many already have, no more prolonged sympathy hugs. I love hugs, but not those kind. They remind me why I'm getting an extra special hug, not because I'm extra special but because something that is common to most women who get pregnant unfortunately happens. Very common, but a good friend recently said to me, "Miscarriages are common, but in no way are they normal." (naturally I'm paraphrasing) Right now I'm not delving deep into depression, nor am I being so dramatic as to assume I'll never be a mother. Do not feel embarrassed if you are just learning of this, to ask about it is not a spear to my heart. I know many have inquired of the pregnancy and get such a look of sadness when they are corrected. Do not dismay dear friends, I am sorry I didn't make an announcement sooner, because this is something we wanted our family and friends to share so we wouldn't have to.

I have a testimony that is steadfast and immovable of all things pertaining to happiness. Those of you who know my beliefs, know that I believe in Eternal Families. I was married to the greatest man in the world in a Temple of God for time and all eternity. Not till death, forever. A concept that is often hard to imagine, but I'm delighted at the prospect of forever with my hubby. We also have forever with any child born, or maybe not quite, because they will be born into the covenant we made. Although, I do not feel this underdeveloped fetus did have a spirit because of how early the pregnancy it was, if it did have a soul it'll be waiting for me when I get there. This experience, although not over, has already brought us closer together. Although most people wish for a stronger marriage, most don't wish to gain it through trials. I will gladly accept my dues. I also know my redeemer lives! He has felt anguish of mothers all over the world who have experienced the same thing I will. How can I do anything but rejoice in the fact that someone has already felt my pains and will be here to comfort and guide me? I know there was nothing I could do to fix this, so I see no point in dwelling on the negative. Often we need to stop and realize we don't have experiences like this simply because our creator wants to watch us suffer. I have stopped and wondered, what will I learn from this? How will this make me a greater mother in the future? How will this make me a better wife? Do I realize even a fraction of how much pain Christ went through for the world's sins?

These things and more I can learn from this, and although I don't have all the answers now I know I will be mother one day and a darn good one. I learned from the best. I also know that I am loved by my creator, how wonderful it is to know that the most powerful being in the universe knows me and loves me for all my strengths and all my faults! Friends, I will be as happy and healthy as I was but a few months ago, so do not worry. I do appreciate the prayers, as they may be the source of our calm and comfort. I know that the Holy Ghost will guide and heal if I am willing to heed.

I am tempted to say amen
-Heather

p.s. for my non-mormon friends I highly recommend listening, reading, or watching a recent talk given by Dieter F. Uchtdorf titled I think:  Forget me not. It was wonderful and uplifting and a joy for any Christian to hear.